Thaw

I hesitate to write this knowing that I might speak too soon, but it seems that winter is actually ending! I had some doubts, in the middle of the month-long snowstorm we were having. Now, while temperatures overnight will continue to drop below freezing for at least a few weeks, I’m sure, the current forecast looks much warmer. That makes me feel so much better about things. I went out today and I noticed a difference in the huge mounds of snow. There are still huge mounds, of course, but there seemed to be no impassable sidewalks left! I was very pleased about that. I can now wear more than just the one pair of shoes again…

The part of spring I really like comes after all the snow has melted, when temperatures are getting up to the 60s and 70s and the sun stays out longer and longer. Style-wise, it’s a lot easier to choose an outfit, especially since I can just throw on a dress and go without putting on tights or leggings, which has deterred me from wearing dresses most days this winter.

But there’s something to be said for those first few warm days as well. They’re the ones that are full of potential, promises, and hope.

If it snows again, though, I’m going to be so upset.

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The Month That Time Forgot

The very beginning of February started out mildly hopeful, although pretty unproductive. Things quickly deteriorated from there. Without meaning to, I ended up taking a hiatus from writing and just about everything else I meant to do.

I blame it mostly on the weather. Blizzards piling on top of each other had such a strong effect on life in Boston this month that productivity suffered in all areas. I work from home, and so I didn’t have to go out in it or try to grapple with the sad public transportation more than a few times, but it seems to me that the energy of the city is frustrated and exhausted, which didn’t help me to feel more motivated. There were also a few social distractions, but that took a much smaller percentage of time than complaining about the weather did.

There was also the somewhat significant matter of not knowing what to write. When I hit a point in the story I had been writing where it just did not want to go any further, and I decided to take a break from it, I didn’t have another project lined up to work on instead. That, I guess, was a mistake. The few times I really made an effort to figure out what I wanted to do, I got nowhere. The creative juices are not flowing.

(Ever think about how weird that phrase is? It’s so weird. I don’t think people should say it anymore.)

As for the writing challenge, which I still intend to complete, I’m now about 30,000 words behind because of my lack of productivity. One thousand words a day is not actually very much if you keep up with it, but it’s a lot to catch up on if you miss more than a few days. Luckily, I still have ten months to go, which is plenty of time if I can make March go better. The way I see it, if I continue to get absolutely nothing done and write just a few words here and there, I can last through May before I’m beyond hope of reaching the end goal of 365,000 words. I am determined to do better than that, and to write much more regularly and hopefully in larger quantities (I’ll worry about quality when I get to editing), so I have plenty of time to catch up.

I also know that many of the ideas for stories and blog posts or internet articles need to be written soon, or I will completely lose track of them. Whether they end up being fit for a reader’s eyes is another question. For now, it’s time to get back into writing! Winter isn’t over yet but spring is closer than any of us think, I’d say. The urge to hibernate has (mostly) passed, and I believe that I can actually get things done as we move out of this blip of a month.

Writer in the Storm

The Big Blizzard is pretty much done. I’ve been cooped up inside too long and I think that if things were a little different, I would go walking outside. Like if I had someone to walk with me, or if I were making an artistic video of walking in the snow. If I were better at filming, that is something I might do. As it is now, I can predict that my efforts would look like a bad school project. A B at best. More likely a C.

This would have been a good opportunity to hunker down (I’m wondering where that phrase comes from. I have never in my life performed an action that I would think of as “hunkering,” nor have I witnessed it from anyone else as far as I can remember) and spend the day reading and writing. Big storms are excellent excuses to be lost in literature. …But I didn’t. I’ve read a little bit, and I’ve written only the smallest amount today. Not creative work, either, just journaling, thought-dumping, if you will. It’s not even the sort of journal-writing people will want to read if I ever get famous. It is, to be blunt, crap.

I’ve fallen behind a bit in the 365 day challenge. At this point I am several thousand words behind, and I have not been meeting the 1,000 word per day goal regularly. I feel very bad about this–most of all when I didn’t write anything, despite having plenty of time. I look back at the end of the day and I feel that I’ve accomplished nothing, and I wonder how I have managed to waste so much time.

What is the solution? Is there a solution, other than “Just do it, stop whining”? Is there something people do to convince themselves that they can do it, whatever it may be that they’re trying to do?

I had more to say, but I’ve been momentarily distracted and lost it, so I should just stop here and say that if you want to find out what happens, come back in a few weeks or months to see if I ever manage to meet my writing goals! Who knows, maybe I’ll even post my word count next time.

Oh, It’s Winter.

When I woke up today it was snowing. I have very mixed feelings about snow. I think it’s beautiful and if it’s not too cold or too wet or icy, I can really enjoy walking in it. However, I do not like being cold and once the salt has been put down, it starts to look really gross. Here in Boston we have slush more often than real snow–at least, that’s how it’s been for the past few years.

It hasn’t been very snowy this winter. There’s been no accumulation at all, and when it does snow, it’s disappeared within a few days. I prefer a slightly warmer winter, but I wouldn’t argue with a persistent, manageable layer of snow throughout the season.

In honor of the snow, have a look at the short story I’ve had on this page¬†for a pretty long time now. And leave a comment or rate the page if you have any thoughts.

Off to try to be productive…

MORE SNOW?!!!!

Did you hear? Another storm is coming. Ugh. I’m not impressed. I could look on the bright side, I guess, and say that at least it’s not going to be ass-numbingly cold again, but I’m morally opposed to snowstorms.

But it seems like a good time to direct you to my Featured Short Story page, where I wrote a rather low-maintenance piece about snow. I suppose you could call it slipstream or speculative fiction, or even fantasy if you want to go that far, but, I don’t know what I call it exactly. I’d love your input on that, though. So if you haven’t read it yet, go ahead and click over. It’s right there under the blog heading.

Since I update the same page with new stories, it might make more sense for you to comment on this post if you have any thoughts about the story. I would be glad to know anyone’s opinions. Constructive comments are always the most desired.

Five Things Friday: December 20, 2013

Things I’ve lost in the last month:

1. Any real motivation to write. It’s still what I want to do all day, if I could, and I have lots of ideas and stuff, but during any free time I have I really, really don’t want to.

2. An unfortunate amount of the Christmas spirit that started showing up in November. Even before Thanksgiving this year, I was feeling excited about Christmas and even listened to Christmas music a little bit. I’m not sure what happened exactly. Got too stressed out? Mood ruined by the fact that buses all lose their damn minds when there’s weather? Either way… bah humbug.

I’m still listening to Christmas music and wearing lots of sparkly things and red things (pretty much like always…) in an attempt to feel more Christmas-y. It probably doesn’t help that I don’t go anywhere that actually has Christmas decorations.

3. Healthy habits. I have only wanted to eat things that are smothered in cheese lately. Sandwiches with cheese, pizza, mac and cheese, cheeseburgers… etc. It doesn’t help that all the vegetables I really like have become ridiculously expensive lately (although that’s my fault, because I go to Whole Foods a lot. It’s not my fault it’s the only grocery store that I actually pass on the way home from work.) I also haven’t been working out as much. Why? Because I’m lazy, or some other reason that I don’t really feel like explaining. So let’s just go with lazy.

4. One of my gloves. But then I found it.

5. My ability to sing. Granted, I don’t know how long it’s been gone because I don’t really sing anymore. But I tried to sing some Christmas carols last week, and I sounded like–well, someone who can’t sing. Basically. This is the result of ten years of voice lessons, then four years without them.

What happened to winter?

Glancing out the window from time to time today, and now listening to the trickle of rain off the roof outside, I am wondering, what has happened to snow? Was it all used up two winters ago, when it was piled so high you couldn’t even reach some of the sidewalks? That might be it. Is it waiting until it’s actually winter (December 22, officially)? I’ve never liked the freezing cold and I always hated sledding, the fun never quite making up for the discomfort of the snow getting inside my boots, snow pants and jacket – which always happened to me, no matter how well-tucked they were – but I would still rather see a glittering blanket of white than this soggy gray mess. I’ve been trying to remember what I liked about winter and coming up blank. The magic is gone.