A Lesson in Sign Placement


These posters, found at Mocha Joe’s cafe in Brattleboro, VT, are a wonderful example of unfortunate sign placement. These posters were not intended to be posted together and, I’m assuming, were put up by two different people. However, because they were put right next to each other, the result is pretty awkward.

I guess the enthusiasm can be admired, but there are other–far less creepy–ways to make a dog happy.

Too Hard to Fit the Mold

I want to be a writer and actually spend my time writing. I want to have a journal in my bag wherever I go, just in case I get inspired and have to write it down THAT VERY SECOND! I want to gaze off into the word-space of my mind and make people feel really awkward because it looks like I am staring at them. I want to sit in a coffee shop with my laptop for hours sipping at a single red-eye after having completely devoured the one pastry I decided I could afford that day, taking up a table for four with just me and my writing materials. (not really the last part. I think it’s stupid when people do that.) Basically, yes, I want to be a stereotype.

Boston is not really helping me out with this. If you’re reading this and you live in boston, tell me something – do you know of a single coffee shop in the area that’s open later than 7? Because, as I spend most days at work, evening is the only time I would be able to do this. Sometimes, when I leave work, I think to myself, “I would really like to get home, grab my laptop, go sit in a cafe with a cup of coffee and just write.” 

The two coffee places that are near enough to make this a reasonable pursuit are Cafe Ula at the Sam Adams Brewery and Caffe Aromi on Centre St. (Just in case you were having trouble stalking me, I thought I’d give you a hand…). Aromi closes at 6, which is around the time when I get there after my 1-hour commute. Ula closes at 7, sometimes 8 maybe, but usually 7, I think, and that leaves barely enough time to get in there and order something after getting home. 

I suppose it’s always possible to take my laptop to a real restaurant and sit down, but until this is an established convention, I will not be the weirdo who tries to maneuver dinner with a huge laptop at one table. (That is my other mistake – the huge laptop.)

So I could only live my dream of being a coffee-shop-writer by doing so during my scant time off from work, when I have to do important things like grocery shopping and sleeping in, or by bringing my laptop to the office with me. Crowded T, possibly crowded bus, giant and kind of heavy laptop, hour-long commute… yeah, that sounds like a lot of fun. 

Basically, until some circumstance or other changes, I can’t be the stereotype I want to be. Can you believe this shit?